About
You're not broken.
Let me guess: You've tried all the self-care "shoulds." The meditation apps, the morning routines, the gratitude journals, diet and exercise. Maybe they helped for a hot minute, but you're still exhausted, anxious, and running on autopilot through a life that doesn't feel like yours. So you fall back into those old habits for some fast 'n dirty dopamine.
Guess what. This is totally normal. Your brain is trying to find some relief, happiness, and certainty after living with a global pandemic, climate catastrophes, fascism on the rise, economic collapse, and media designed to keep you hooked in a constant state of fight-or-flight.
Here's the truth nobody wants to tell you: You're not failing as a human. Your nervous system is responding exactly as it should to generations of cultural and systemic fuckery - and it's being pushed to its absolute breaking point by the extreme conditions of our current world.
Believe it or not- you're actually doing pretty well.
But you could definitely be doing better.
This Isn't Just Self-Care - It's a Revolution
I'm Crystal McLain, and I'm here to shake things up with science-backed truth and help you understand what's REALLY going on in your body and brain so you can show up with confidence and clarity, and live the life you deserve.
My approach isn't about adding more to your already demanding life or forcing you into someone else's idea of wellness. It's about Creative Self Care - rewiring your brain to reject everything that taught you to shrink, using science-backed techniques that actually work for REAL humans living REAL lives- who want to elevate their health, resilience and satisfaction.
My Story: From Survivor to Self Care Revolutionary
I spent decades using my body as a punching bag - binge eating, drinking, smoking, extreme people-pleasing, workaholism - anything to numb the pain of childhood trauma and prove myself in a world that taught me I wasn't enough. I was drowning in shame, giving 100% to everyone else while my own nervous system screamed for help.
When I stumbled into massage therapy school (honestly, just wanted to be my own boss and maybe travel), something clicked. Learning about stress, pain, and how the body actually works opened a door I didn't know existed. I dove deep into trauma research, somatic experiencing, cellular memory - and discovered that my "failures" weren't personal shortcomings. They were logical responses to an illogical world.
Since 2009, I've been making it my mission to heal myself while creating safe, supportive spaces for others to do the same. Because once you understand WHO you are and HOW you function, the lights turn on. You stop taking your struggles personally and start taking your power back.
Why My Approach Is Different
A lot of traditional wellness is soft and fluffy - very trust the process and love and light. And that's fine for some people. But sometimes we need real straight-talk: You can't just "get over" your shit, and generic advice and commercialized self care aren't going to create the lasting changes you need.
My approach combines:
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Science-backed nervous system regulation (because your body is incredibly smart when you understand how to work WITH it)
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Creative practices that make healing easy and effective instead of another chore on your to-do list
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Radical mindset shifts that help you turn stress into strength and resilience
- Real talk about systemic oppression and wellness culture and how they both profit from keeping you dysregulated and disconnected
Creative Self Care: Your Revolutionary Toolkit
Creative Self Care transforms daily activities into powerful moments of self-connection and healing by utilizing your natural abilities - curiosity, creative thinking, and neuroplasticity (your brain's badass ability to rewire itself).
We'll explore:
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Mindfulness practices that wrangle your brain and fit your actual life (no long hours of meditation or yoga are necessary)
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Body-based techniques to regulate your nervous system that you can do just about any time, anywhere
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Creative practices that make self-care authentic and enjoyable instead of dreading more crap you have to do
- Practical strategies to break free from dopamine-driven habits and give you the good stuff instead, like endorphins, serotonin, and oxytocin
How To Get Started
LEARN
Get the science-backed truth your nervous system needs.
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Blog & Podcast: Real talk and zero bullshit insights LEARN MORE
- Online Courses: Deep-dive education for lasting transformation LEARN MORE
CONNECT
Where personal empowerment meets collective power.
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Patreon Community: Your sanctuary for unconventional wisdom - exclusive content and live conversations in a troll-free zone where your weirdness is welcomed LEARN MORE
- Workshops, Classes & Retreats: Group experiences for collective healing LEARN MORE
TRANSFORM
Personal guidance for your personal revolution
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1:1 Mentoring: Personalized stress management and healthy habit formation for humans ready to rewrite their story LEARN MORE
- Bodywork: A restorative mix of therapeutic techniques to reconnect body and mind while reclaiming your autonomy. LEARN MORE
In a World That Profits From Your Exhaustion, Self-Care Is Resistance
When you invest in your wellbeing, you're not just working on personal improvement - you're part of a larger movement for change. Every step you take toward nervous system regulation and conscious living creates ripples of transformation in our communities.
Remember: Your healing is our revolution.
A Little More About Me
I'm a licensed massage therapist specializing in trauma-informed care, plus mentor, speaker, blogger, and podcast host. While science steers my ship, I hold space for magic and mystical wisdom. I'm goofy, sassy, and I swear like a friggin' pirate because humor and expression are essential to healing.
I stand firmly for:
- Reproductive rights and body autonomy
- Gender-affirming care
- LGBTQIA+ rights
- Racial justice and equity
- Healthcare accessibility for all
If you believe in diversity, body autonomy, and creating a more equitable world, we're going to get along just fine.
The first step to changing the world is changing how we show up for ourselves. Let's start that revolution together. Let's get creative.
WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING
-Cindy
-Diedre
-Cyndle
-Edie
